Travel back in Time Tuesday

I was looking through some of my old diaries from my old teenage years.  I found this old picture, I was only fifteen in the picture.  The picture was in my diary actually marked under Sept 23, 1983.  Here’s what I wrote.  This was one of my first journals.   I actually named the journal when I was 12.
Dear David
I’m finally going to try; no not try, am going to straighten out my life.  I know I need to organize my life if I expect to be a good businessman one day.  I havn’t done any real writing in a while.  Tomorrow is my mom’s birthday.  She’s going to be 37 years old.  I can’t imagine being that old, I’m going to be 16 in a few months. Growing up is painful, I guess it’s puberty.  What am I learning about life, one thing is I better keep my big mouth and ears closed.  It’s for the best I know so much gossip, Rona Barrett may learn something from it.  I’m not going to write anything I know, someone in my family may read it, mama has found a way to pick the lock on here.  I also have been keeping a dream journal, I have some really intersting dreams, scary ones too.  Shannon is still the only person I really like.   I’ve been seeing two girls that are 18 and 21, they babysit my neighbor’s Pam little boys.  I really don’t know how to control myself around them.  I try and stay cool, calm, and collective, then they start up subjects about sex.  It’s so confusing, (Not Sex) just the actual thought of doing it.  They like teasing me,  they are sisters too, and they both have kissed me.   But I really am not sure why I’m doing it. I’ll figure it out I guess.  I worry way too much.   I got a letter from my best friend, life doesn’t seem to be the same since he moved away.   I looked forward to every day I got to spend with him, I miss him so bad.  Sometimes I wish I could run away and live with him, but I know I would miss my family.   I wish he would move back.   Maybe I can at least go visit him sometime.  I feel like I lost a part of me.  He would always help me with my problems and I would tell him everything.  I always thought it was funny that I named you David when I was twelve, and then he moved across the street and his name was David too.  I’m really feeling down.  I’ve never really had a friend like that.  I hope this doesn’t sound like we are gay, we’re not.  We’ve just went through a lot.  We went through puberty together.  He moved to Jacksonville, Florida.  It was so hard to say goodby to him, but we took it with stride.  I’ll be getting my driver’s license soon, I guess maybe I will even get a car.  I wonder what he’s doing right now.
Is a precious art
Known by millions, but shared by two.
Felt deep within each person’s heart,
Friendship is precious art.
Strong friendships never torn apart;
Remaining old and beginning new,
Friendship is a precious art
Known by millions, but shared by us
Funny looking back at my old journals, I’m reading Mississippi Sissy, by Kevin Sessums,, I’m really enjoying it.  I’m sure I’ll be writing an entry about it soon.   Strange sometimes reading my old journals and what they hold.  In that one entry, I was confused with girls, but cherishing one of my most powerful male friendships of my young life at fifteen.  At that time I don’t think I had ever really loved another guy as much as I did my friend David, although I never wrote it in my journal, after all my mama might have picked my lock on my journal.  I had a really nice weekend.   Cooking for a friend tomorrow, looking forward to that.   Had chorus practice yesterday, and have practice again on Friday.  Hope everyone’s having a great week, my clothes are dry so time to fold.

~ by deveil on SeptemberUTCb000000pmTue, 23 Sep 2008 20:16:25 +000008 19, 2007.

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